Tis OFFICIALLY the Season to be Jolly

I had a wonderful Thanksgiving, and I hope everyone else did as well.

Yesterday was the day after Thanksgiving, which is when the Christmas season officially begins for me! I'm Jewish...So I don't think I'm supposed to like Christmas. But I LOVE the holidays and I'm so excited that the season of Christmas movies, crisp air, snow, candy canes, hot chocolate, and mistletoe is upon us!

Last night, I decided to go see Breaking Dawn, which was surprising.
I loved those books in high school. Well, I loved them with caution. I knew they were super unrealistic and kind of cheesy, but they were addicting. The last movie I saw was Eclipse and I hated it. It was just overly cheesy and not interesting--a lot of nothing.
My best friend really wanted to see Breaking Dawn pt. 2 and I agreed that I would watch Breaking Dawn pt. 1 on a website at home, and if I could sit through it, I would go. I ended up liking part 1 quite a lot so I went to go see it with her and part 2 was AWESOME so I'm really glad I decided to give it a try. If you've seen the other movies, but are skeptical, do it! It really was a very well-done movie. Breaking Dawn was my least favorite book, but the two movies that comprised it were by far my favorites.

Today, I went to get some grooming done, though I still need to buy hair dye and have that happen because I have gray hairs (I know, I'm the worst 21-year old ever). I do feel better though. Being up at school is rough when there's no one I know to do my nails or waxing. I'm very picky and don't want to spend money on something I won't like. The woman that does my nails made a comment that I'm doing a great job maintaining my weight loss. That was nice to hear, but means I'm not exactly on track. Thanksgiving break is so short and it always does this to me.
Tonight, I'm going to Southern Hospitality for the 3rd anniversary of "Friendsgiving"! I'm sure it'll be fun, but I have to say, I'll miss all of us cooking together and then getting drunk in the apartment. This'll be the first year we're going out instead of staying in.

Tomorrow morning is the drive back upstate. I'm excited to go back because I miss my normal schedule. But I'm not excited for all the work I''ll need to do once I'm there. I have too much fun on vacation and sleep in like it's nobody's business!

Food...Oh good lord, I am thankful that competition season and holiday season come right next to each other, so that I can work off all this food during practice next week. It's not that I've been a glutton in any way. But I have eaten a lot more than is normal for me. The goods news is I'll be dancing my average-sized tushy off for 3 hours a day next week in prep for my ballroom dance competition at Columbia and trying to eat as clean as possibile so that I don't bloat in my dresses. So, as soon as today is over, we're back in business.

In order to better myself, I need to better myself

This is a weird way to start off a blog, I'll grant myself that. I'm not giving away any sort of introduction or clue about me, but if you're reading this, you should know that I'm a ranter; and, often, it doesn't have very much value to anyone but myself.

But it is what it is. Here it goes. I need to better myself in order to better myself. What do I mean by that? I mean, I don't think I can lose weight while simultaneously being the kind of person that I've become. I can feel myself becoming selfish and bratty. I feel myself doing less things for others and doing myself. I feel myself not trusting anyone, including a person who I claim to trust to the end of the world. I feel myself pushing people away and snapping at them.

I can't remember what it was like to be a nice girl, when every word out of my mouth wasn't sarcastic. I feel like I'm happier when I'm nicer. I still do things for people and get by on that to have friends. But I'm cranky and moody and I don't think there's a single person who appreciates it.

I can feel my best friends slipping away from me because it's difficult to be around me. And I want it to stop. I am NOT this person. I have NEVER been this person and I refuse to allow myself to continue to be sour because my life isn't perfect.

So here's to improving the way I am to improve what I eat and how I work out. Maybe I'll go about my days feeling better about myself and be able to spend time not feeling so jaded. Maybe I'll be more productive. Maybe I'll laugh more, and smile more. I want to do this. This HAS to come first.

Happy Thanksgiving to anyone that might be reading! Remember to be thankful for everything that you have because that's my plan!